[Note: The Selfish Seamstress is overflowing with joy and expletives at this latest sewing coup. At the same time, she realizes that much of her readership consists of gentlewomen of refined breeding whose delicate sensibilities may be offended by profanity. She is therefore censoring the naughty words in this post by replacing all of the vowels in them with “e.”]

Holy fecking shet, betches, the Selfish Seamstress made her some jeans and they are the fecking bomb! Check these badess feckers out:

Oh yes, these are my new jeans made from the famous Jalie 2908 pattern, low rise version. I realize that I am totally the last betch on the Jalie 2908 bandwagon, but I don’t give a shet. I am as proud of these jeans as if I had drafted the fecking pattern myself. They weren’t even meant to be production level, they were meant to be a muslin. But I am totally wearing this betch. I want to wear them every fecking day. This may be the greatest sewing coup of my entire sewing career, because I have *never* had jeans that fit the way I want them to. You see, in addition to being very short, I am also long waisted, which means my inseam is *extremely* short.  It’s pretty much impossible for me to find jeans that aren’t huge through the thigh and knee, and when I can find ones that fit in those areas, they’re literally 6-8″ too long. And hemming isn’t a great option because the knee is still in the wrong place.  When I can find a jean that fits, it’s usually pretty shapeless and nondescript. And in case you were thinking it, kids jeans don’t work either.  While they’re the right fit in the thigh and inseam, kids jeans are cut for kids with flat kiddie butts and the Selfish Seamstress, despite having a kiddie inseam, has a grown up butt. Fecked up, right?

I picked the smallest adult size for the Jalie jeans (size R).  The measurements looked a little bit big, but I didn’t want to go down to one of the kid sizes because I think the proportions for the kids version are different.  As many have noted, this pattern has a tendency to gape in the back, so I ended up compensating for that by taking some off of the back yoke piece at the side seams. Other than that, I shortened through the thigh by one inch.  I figured that would put the knee in the right place and then any additional shortening could happen at the hem. But I don’t know what kind of weird-ess traveling pants shet that pattern has going on, but mysteriously the length turned out perfect for me- I didn’t have to take any off the hem. How is that even possible?  Feck that, I’m not going to look that gift horse in the mouth. The only really significant edit I had to make was to take the legs in at both the inseam and outseam to make them slimmer as they were baggy through the leg.  I started taking in gradually from the hip and ended up removing about 1″ from the circumference at the knee, and then tapered back down to the leg opening. Oh yeah, and I added a coin pocket and rivets. And now they are just right- the jeans I have always wished I could find in a store! 

I cut the waistband on the crossgrain for a couple of reasons.  First I had read that cutting it on the bias (as the pattern recommends) results in too much stretching.  Second, I thought that the fabric I ordered was 60″, but it must have actually been 45″ or 50″ because it turned out that I was only able to fit all the pattern pieces in though a very economic layout, which left only enough fabric for me to cut the waistband on the cross grain.  It’s therefore a little more stretchy and less stable than I’d like. But next time I’m going to make sure I have enough fabric to cut it lengthwise, and you can bet your fecking ess that I’m going to be making these betches again and again. Feck yeah.

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