What’s your problem?
What’s your problem?

Will you sew something for me?

Please?  I’ll pay you!
Okay, now we’re talking. My hypothetical going rate is $85/hour for labor.  In addition, you will also be responsible for the cost of fabric, patterns, notions, and any snacks I may consume while making your garment. I reserve the right to refuse requests. In the event that I take on your project, I reserve the right to make design, fabric, and construction changes without your knowledge or consent. I offer no guarantee of satisfaction. Don’t forget to ask about my $2 discount for close friends and family. You still here?

Are you as selfish as you claim to be?

Why are you so selfish?  How did you get this way?
This conversation is boring me.

Why don’t you draft patterns in my size?
For now, the Coffee Date Dress is the only pattern I have drafted in a multi-size pattern. I’m not an expert at drafting, and I’m definitely not an expert at grading. Grading for me is a tedious and difficult process, and there’s no way for me to check whether I’ve graded accurately without making a bunch of samples in other sizes and fitting them on other people. I just don’t have time to make multiple versions of the same dress for a bunch of people. Sorry!

I love one of the 1950s vintage patterns in your collection! I’ve been looking for it everywhere and I desperately need it for my prom/wedding/Oscar ceremony. Can you make a copy for me?
Believe me, I sympathize with you, but unless you have Vogue S-4010 and want to make a trade for it, no. Despite lots of inquiring and searching, I have never been able to find definitive information that convinces me that copying and distributing vintage patterns from the 1950s is legal in all cases. In addition, copying patterns is time consuming and requires big paper and lots of space. If you can provide me with evidence that proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that a particular pattern is no longer under copyright (and by this I mean something along the lines of a record from the US Copyright Office indicating that the copyright on a specific pattern has expired, not a quote from an ill-informed rant about pattern copyright on someone’s blog), then we can talk. My hypothetical fee for legally copying patterns is the same as my hypothetical fee for sewing: $85/hour for labor plus all materials costs.

Can we talk privately?

Selfish beeyatch.
You know it.