Sigh. Here’s the backstory. Several weeks ago (possibly several months ago), Dan sheepishly approached me with a couple of pairs of pants and whispered meekly that they had holes in the front pockets. I arched my back and bared my teeth, but he pressed on. Could I please, please unselfishly mend the pockets for him?
For those who aren’t already well familiar with my feelings about mending for others, here’s a quick primer. In any case, I’m sure you can imagine my response, the only rational response a rational person could possibly have. I called him a few choice names, threw things at his head, and then walked around all day muttering under my breath about some people who stubbornly insist on carrying their ballpoint pens in their front pockets and then expect other people to repair the damage afterwards. Then I tossed the pants in a corner where they started gathering dust and I growled ferociously every time he looked at them and said, “If you have a minute, could you…” I never let him finish the sentence, but I’m pretty sure I know where he was going with it. I think up until this point in the story, we can all agree that I was being more than fair.
Well, Dan turned the situation upside down yesterday evening. He went to the mall after work to exchange a shirt, and he came back with this:
Sigh, a new laptop bag in wine red polished leather that he found on sale. You see, the Selfish Seamstress has been in need of a proper laptop bag for a while. On a daily basis she uses a bright yellow messenger bag suitable for a bike courier but rather incongruous when she wears more business-y attire. The new laptop bag is professional, practical, and a lovely shade of leather that happens to go perfectly with a particular favorite pair of Michael Kors heels in the Selfish Seamstress’s closet.
So, I ate the teeniest, tiniest sliver of humble pie that I could get my hands on, and sucked it up. Even though it’s not a fair trade by any means and he will owe me forever after this, laptop bag or no laptop bag, I mended the pockets.
It took forever and it was extremely challenging, but I figured that it would be worthwhile to go that extra mile and make sure Dan would be plenty indebted. Here are the results of hours of labor:
As you can see, it’s pretty intricate stuff. We’re talking about several inches of straight stitching, plus backtacking at the beginning and end, and clipping the threads afterwards. Maybe I’ll post a tutorial about the thread clipping some day, you know, for advanced sewers. Wanting to ensure the best, most professional results, I selected a lovely contrasting thread in a shade of deep plum because it was what was still in the machine after I finished my Burda 12-2006-109 dress.
Anyway, there you have it. The Selfish Seamstress mended three pockets today for someone else. I could hang my head in shame, but with the new laptop bag I think Dan is at least partway to making up the debt. And don’t worry- the Selfish Seamstress is fastidious about keeping score.
47 comments
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August 10, 2010 at 7:44 pm
Peter
You are all heart, my dear. I don’t even mend my OWN pockets; I just stop putting things in them when stuff starts falling out.
Lovely bag, btw.
August 10, 2010 at 7:52 pm
kathyh
I never minded mending pockets before but you are right – the thread clipping is a learned skill. I believe I have just left the threads hanging there.
A tutorial is requested.
August 10, 2010 at 7:57 pm
Sandi
That bag is fantastic!
August 10, 2010 at 7:59 pm
gina Snyder
Your post made me LOL! I can so relate! I had a stack about a foot high in the corner waiting to be mended. My son came in the other day and said “Your not ever going to fix those are you? I’m taking them to the cleaners!” He grabs them (like oh please don’t threaten me with the cleaners, oh no!). Anyway, I proceeded to tell him that asking a seamstress/designer is like asking Picasso to paint your garage!
I think he got the point. Anyway he left with the clothes!
Hugs,
gina
August 11, 2010 at 8:45 am
selfishseamstress
Ooh, you are a smart one. My hat is off to you!
August 10, 2010 at 8:06 pm
Susan
All I can say is Dan is very, very lucky to know you and he should be eternally grateful.
August 11, 2010 at 8:46 am
selfishseamstress
I tell him that *every day.*
August 10, 2010 at 8:12 pm
Bernadette W
Dan is almost as brilliant as Ms. Selfish. With. Impeccable. Taste.
August 10, 2010 at 8:54 pm
Unsuitable for Diagonals
I want that bag! I’ve been looking for something just like that and love the color! Can’t believe your S.O. actually picked out something so great on his own. Are you sure he’s straight?
August 11, 2010 at 8:55 am
selfishseamstress
Hmm. I can’t find it online, but the brand is (I suppose fittingly) La Diva. I’d never heard of it before, but I’m not really a bag person.
Hahaha, I get that question about Dan a fair bit :) We’ve been together for nearly 5 years and I haven’t yet seen any evidence that he’s about to leave me for a guy (much to the chagrin of quite a number of guys.) He wears man capris, knits and crochets, likes to pick out clothes for me to try on when we shop, and even tried out my ballet class once because he wanted to know what *my* workouts feel like. At this point I figure if he were gay, he’d just go ahead and BE gay :)
August 10, 2010 at 8:58 pm
stitchywitch
My husband wants me to repair the pocket in his favorite pants, but I tell him that it’s a sign he needs new pants (and he does… I’m just giving him motivation.)
Love the bag!
August 10, 2010 at 9:22 pm
Katherine
You’re weak because you’re still in the *really-in-love* phase. Marry him already. Then all gratitude mending can stop. (Kidding…. mostly.)
August 10, 2010 at 9:28 pm
Miriam in KS
You made me laugh!
This method is how I mend my husband’s pockets. I do hope, however, that Dan is much more gracious in his appreciation of your capabilities than my guy has been recently. He has a hissy fit when his keys get stuck because he is wearing the pocket out above the mending. But maybe if we replaced his work pants more often, this wouldn’t be an issue. Nah, not doing that! He ruins a new pair of work pants on almost the first wearing. Let ‘im fight the mending. Ha!
(That and I have to hem every new pair of pants and for me hemming rtw is worse than mending. I’d rather make new any day.)
August 11, 2010 at 8:56 am
selfishseamstress
Sigh. It’s sort of a catch-22 for you with the pants, huh? In our house, only one person is allowed to have hissy fits, and you can probably guess who that is :)
August 12, 2010 at 10:27 pm
Miriam in KS
He had another “episode” this evening with those pockets. Looked like he was swatting bees! All I could do was smirk, giggle and think of this post. Especially when he called the pockets and his key ring names!
You would have enjoyed the show.
August 10, 2010 at 9:41 pm
paisleyapron
I am smarter than you–I just married a man who could sew. ha ha.
But that bag is beautiful…I guess I’ll never get such lovely pay offs as long as he fixes his own stuff.
August 10, 2010 at 10:07 pm
Jessica
*Sighs* If only my husband would attempt to persuade me to do his mending by buying me such lovely gifts. Did Dan come with such impeccable taste in bags or is that the result of training?
August 10, 2010 at 10:18 pm
Meredith P
Wow, that is a nice bag! Must show my DH who pitifully expects me to sew on buttons with my diamond encrusted Bernina. Hmmph! That even requires semi-matching thread…
August 11, 2010 at 8:57 am
selfishseamstress
Next time just replace the button with some stick-on Velcro. That should do the trick ;)
August 10, 2010 at 11:08 pm
MakingTime
Wow, what stunning stitchery!
I do looooove the tux dress. I wish I had more ability to see past the illustrations like that.
August 10, 2010 at 11:11 pm
Tilly
THREE pockets? Surely that deserves three bags in return?
August 11, 2010 at 8:58 am
selfishseamstress
Either that or one bag, one pair of shoes, and dinner out. There are a bunch of ways you can mix it up!
August 11, 2010 at 12:00 am
Rebeca
Hey Selfish, I laughed myself to tears while reading this. What a brilliant couple. You certainly deserve each other. I wish you a long life full of happiness together :-)
August 11, 2010 at 8:59 am
selfishseamstress
Thank you for your warm wishes :) It should be quite a trip!
August 11, 2010 at 12:16 am
lin3arossa
So funny! I’m silently lol because I’m at work. Why do you do that to me. Anyway, that Dan is a keeper, really!
August 11, 2010 at 12:17 am
lin3arossa
Does he take interns? I’d like to apply for my boyfriend.
August 11, 2010 at 1:21 am
magdamagda
I’m waiting for the tutorial you mentioned;) plus one on how to get a bag like that for mending pockets, coz i’m afraid i’d rush into mending and get no bag
August 11, 2010 at 4:03 am
Gaylene
What were you thinking???? You’ve sold us all down the river..in times of weakness, when put upon to replace a button/hem trousers/etc, I looked to you for guidance…what would the SS say? NO – obviously, and now, all for a measly BAG (not even shoes), Non Sewing Partners across the world will rise up, with expectations of altruistic mending…..oh, the humanity…
August 11, 2010 at 5:23 am
Jan
I, too, married a man who does his own mending (well, 99.44% of it). So, more sewing time for me, but no gifts :-( Excellent bag, BTW. Dan’s a keeper for sure.
August 11, 2010 at 5:50 am
Auntie Allyn
LOL, your post reminded me of a time (many years ago) when my at-that-time boyfriend showed up at my home on my birthday, with a dozen roses in one arm and several pair of pants in the other arm that needed hemming. THAT was the beginning of the end of our relationship!
August 11, 2010 at 9:02 am
selfishseamstress
OMG, that is a *hilarious* story! Fortunately I don’t think Dan had any designs about the pants when he bought the bag, so I don’t think he was thinking of an exchange of goods for services. He certainly didn’t make a peep about the pants when he gave me the bag- he doesn’t really have the same natural conniving tendencies that I do, which, as you can imagine, is an extremely advantageous situation for me :)
Seriously though, brilliant story. If he ended up with someone, I kind of have to wonder what she must be like :D
August 11, 2010 at 5:52 am
kathleen
What an inspiration you are! From now on no mending will happen Chez Hunting Creek until after leather goods have been offered in advance.
August 11, 2010 at 6:42 am
Kathi
I HATE mending!!!!!!!!!! I need to repair a seam in a pair of my pants — they have been sitting and waiting to be fixed ALL SUMMER! I only need to fix the side seam, it will not take long. There is just something about making repairs . . .
Your laptop bag is lovely!
August 11, 2010 at 6:44 am
Julie
Your post and comments from other reader just brightened my whole day (how very sad and pathetic but let’s not dwell, shall we?).
August 11, 2010 at 9:03 am
selfishseamstress
:D Glad your day is looking much better. Good work, girls!
August 11, 2010 at 7:33 am
Justiina
Because my husband would never, ever come up with anything that clever, there is a pair of his pants on the attic that have been waiting for repairing for so long that I’ve forgotten what needs to be done to them and he has forgotten about the pants. I’m going to toss them in the goodwill bag when I get around to that…
August 11, 2010 at 7:47 am
Samina
Wait, you’re supposed to snip the thread? Damn, is that why all of my projects are still connected to each other?
August 11, 2010 at 8:48 am
Nikole
Dan’s just showing us (you) that he’s smarter. He knows you would never mend them voluntarily/ in a decent frame of time so he HAD to pull out the big guns. Go Dan!
August 11, 2010 at 10:33 am
Jessie
I’m totally confused. Dan can sew right? Is he not allowed to use your machine? Someone is cleverly orchestrating something here, but I’m not sure who or what!
August 11, 2010 at 1:06 pm
kaydee
Yeah, I was going to comment on Dan’s ability to sew also. After all he has at least made himself a shirt (????) in the past and now a dog jacket also. Surely he could manage to sew up the bottoms of 3 pockets?!!
August 11, 2010 at 1:48 pm
Emilie
The last time I was asked to mend pockets I took the seam ripper and neatly removed all pockets. He didn’t find that so funny. Oddly enough, we’re no longer together… hmmm.
August 11, 2010 at 3:07 pm
juebejue
you are so hilarious! my husband had been bugging me to sew some velco onto a pair of curtains that keeps gaping and annoys him for months. i keep on telling him, sure, ill do it when i feel like it. last week he took a needle and some threads and did it himself. mauhaahahah!!!
August 11, 2010 at 8:50 pm
Drsue
very amusing. perhaps your SO and other SO’s of sewers should have a sort of AA type of meeting group. My husband asked me (meekly) to mend his bike shorts (the crotch padding had come unstitched in a small part. I explained to DH how I was a SEWIST and MENDING was something all together different. After about 6 months of those shorts hanging out at my sewing table, I finally did “get around” to mending then. Hubby was shocked when I handed the repaired shorts to him. “I had resigned myself to never getting those fixed” he said.
August 12, 2010 at 6:52 am
Helen K
You poor dear. I got tired just reading all that you endured for Dan.
Helen
August 15, 2010 at 4:21 am
ChristineB
I just finished sewing a button on DH’s corduroy pants. Yes, it probably would have been nicer if I had done it for him last winter when the damn thing came off, but it’s taken until now for me to have the appropriate color thread in my sewing machine (what? you think I would actually interrupt MY sewing to re-thread it for A. Single. Button?).
August 21, 2010 at 3:54 pm
Crystal
hmm… maybe it’s a fair enough trade, but it sure seems he could have managed the pocket sewing himself. Personally, I will not mend my beloved pants until he at least tries. (although, I really do hate looking at the result of his mending. I may have to *gasp* rip it out and fix it correctly myself, when I get tired of looking at it.)
August 24, 2010 at 5:08 pm
Tasia
I like this post – I might send it ‘accidentally’ to Mr Sewaholic in case he gets any crazy ideas about me mending things…